The National Addiction Memorial honors the loved ones we’ve lost.

My son Austen was such a kind, laidback, no drama type of guy. He was a mommas boy for sure. He loved to play soccer and was a star goalie. He loved to ski and would ski backwards and stick one leg in the air. I never knew how he could do that!! And he had one heck of an arm. He could throw a mad fastball and was just all around a great athlete. He worked hard every day but sadly he had an addiction and died from fentanyl. I will never forget my awesome amazing son.

Larger than life. Loved and missed by all who knew him. xoxo

Jen was my last baby. I had two sons and a baby girl to complete mine and my soulmates family. She was a wonderful little girl who loved life and living until she was introduced to heroin. When her grandfather died, she was 14. There were two limos, one for the adults and one for the kids. She was so upset. We were a close family and she loved her Pop. He had been sick for quite awhile. Her cousin, whom she looked up to since she was nine or 10, told her she knew how she could feel better. Now mind you, her cousin was around 19 at the time. She took Jen from the limo into her Mom's bathroom and introduced my baby to heroin. After many trials and tribulations and some recovery time mixed in there came a time something terribly tragic happened to her, something she couldn't get over something that gave her PTSD and nightmares during the day.
She shared it with me when she was about 22. Her uncle, my brother, had raped her, I said, "When?' She said, "It was awhile ago." I asked, "Why didn't you tell me?" and she said, "Because it was my fault." I said "What???" She said, "I was high and made myself available." I said, "I don't care if you were high for a month and laid out spread eagle naked every night, the first time he should have folded you up, and brought you home, for God's sake, he was your Uncle, it is all on him, let's call the cops." She said no it was too late, and she didn't want to start stuff and who would believe me? I said, "You got seven years, did he do it before you were 18 because then you have a lifetime." She said it was after she was 18, and I thought good, cause if not I would be going to jail, because I was going after him. She never would call the cops, but she never could get it out of her mind and it ate her alive. I told her he was dead to me, she said, "I didn't think you would believe me." I said, "please call the cops." She never did. A few more years of going through hell and her father and I decided to leave the house we had brought all our babies home to and raised them in. A house we had lived in for 37 years. We told Jen she was more then welcome to come, sober. Jen had lost so many friends to this epidemic the only friends she had now were her drug friends, but she didn't leave at first. After a year she overdosed, actually on Christmas, she came to live with us in the new house after that and straightened out for the longest time ever. She got a good job, she bought a car, she was really doing good. A year went by, I thought she had kicked this thing. About six months after that I noticed she was acting differently, so I questioned her and she said, "You are watching me too closely mom I'm fine, everything's good." I thought I was overreacting. Three months later I knew she was drinking and I confronted her. Of course she denied it, but I knew. Two months after that we got the call, they had found her in her car with the needle in her arm. She had bought heroin, or so she thought, but someone sold her straight fentanyl. The police still call it a homicide. 11/21/18. Now I live every day without her, my baby, my girl, my life. Her brothers, her father, her children live every day without her. Life as we knew it changed on that day before Thanksgiving 2018.

Samantha Nicole born November 16th, 1995 and Jaxsen Michael both died November 3rd, 2018. I would like to shed light on the Samantha that we all know and love! Trying to end the stigma and show the world that all lives matter! You see, I know two people here, I know Sam, and all the bad that came with an addicts behaviors, and I know Samantha, my sweet innocent baby girl! During her journey in life, she was very smart and intelligent and active in extracurricular activities in school! It took her just one time to try a drug that forever changed our lives. During her addiction we fought with law enforcement, judges, states attorneys, probation officers, parole officer rehab centers, you name it! At no point did we not try and fight for her life when she just couldn't anymore! During this journey we learned that things need to change and fast. Samantha's journey taught me to love people no matter what and be less judgmental towards the human race! You see my struggle as the parent of an addict. We tried so many ways to help as she fought just as hard. The rehab system sucks! Yes I know they have to want the help. Well I watched as my daughter wanted the help, I mean deep down didn't want to live that way anymore...but the cravings and the mind control and the physical pain outweighed that want in the end. We got her on vivatrol and it helped save her, until in August 2018 we found out she was pregnant and was due in January 2019. At that point even though the OBGYN said baby was fine and healthy and ok'D her to remain on vivatrol throughout the pregnancy, her primary doctor said they would no longer prescribe the vivatrol shot knowing it was saving two lives....4 more shots and baby Jaxsen would have been born! I lost my only child and grandchild in the blink of an eye! Please keep in mind every life matters! #justiceforsamnjax

BreAna was the most beautiful, smart, affectionate, and hilarious daughter a mom could ask for. She was a lover of people, and was welcoming to all walks of life. She was a great leader and protector, a loving sister and daughter.

In her mid-late teens, Bre was diagnosed w chronic pancreatitis, which introduced her to pain medication. Soon after, she began taking prescription Xanax to help her sleeplessness and anxiety. She had also began taking medication for depression. Xanax was her drug of choice.

Over the years, she became addicted, and was unable to deal well with the stresses of losing her great-grandma, becoming a parent, and separating from the love of her life. After a very tough year or so, two of her addictions clashed, and she passed away of combined drug toxicity (benzos and opioids).

She left behind a huge community of grievers, friends who would remember her as someone who would sit with them in their darkness. She left behind six younger siblings and a two-year-old son with the banshee spirit, just like her.

I did not understand everything when she was alive, as I do now, and for that I am very sorry. However, I believe that by being willing to talk about her story, others will be saved.

#breanalandforever 💜🌻

Josh was a smart, giving, loving person. He has a love for God, family, and friends. This world is broken without him here. Forever lo♡ed and forever missed.

A friend who was more like a protective big brother to me--as the 3rd anniversary of his death approaches, I’m taking the time to reflect on all of our fun memories together, and learning to forgive myself for feeling guilty that I could not do more for him. I honor his memory by constantly working to change the stigma surrounding mental health and drug addiction in my community.

On January 4, 2019 the world was robbed of a beautiful soul. Vanessa was a second grade teacher, a wife, a daughter, and a sister. She was a giver. A bright place in a dark World. The broken were drawn to her comfort. The sick craved her healing nature. The sad craved her smile. She was an aunt to a little girl who desperately needed her. And she was an addict.
In a series of circumstances, intoxication being the key component, she got on the freeway going the wrong direction at 330 a.m. At 339 she was pronounced dead. At that moment the universe changed. We will never be the same.

Chad was the funniest, most handsome, and kindhearted person I’ve ever had the honor of knowing.
He had a quiet calmness about his spirit that I know a lot of people admired.

There is not a day that goes by that I do not wish and wonder what if and if only.

I love you Chad and I know you will never be gone. Just not visible for a while.
Find the peace and rest that you are so worthy of my love.

Adam was the heart and soul of my family. Loving son, brother, father, and uncle. Adam struggled for many years with his addiction. In and out of rehabs, county jails, we thought he'd finely found some answers within a program he'd been attending for two years. He maintained his sobriety for three years when one morning I received that earth shattering phone call he'd been taken from us. Life isn't the same for my family as we are learning how to continue without Adam. He's truly missed forever by his family and friends.

Steven was a loving son, brother, boyfriend, grandson, nephew, cousin, and friend to everyone! His smile could light up a room and he would talk to anyone. He was smart, handsome, compassionate, and funny! He loved making people laugh! Steven was a hard worker and always gave it his all. He loved golf and playing his guitar. He loved his dog and all other animals, too. Everyone who ever met him loved him! He was also a caring nurse in the ICU, always giving loving care to his patients and help to his coworkers.
Steven admitted, after an accidental overdose, to taking fentanyl from work to help him sleep. In his head he was self-medicating and was probably curious to what his patient's were feeling. Even as a little boy he wanted to know about everything and would always tell everyone new facts that he learned. He entered rehab for 30 days and then went back to work in the ICU while attending outpatient treatment. He was determined to beat his addiction and everyone was so proud of him. He didn't want to try MAT because he felt like it was substituting one drug for another. We wish he would have tried it.
We were so proud of the work he put into his recovery and are blessed that we had that time to learn about his struggles. He fought for eight months but the addiction won. Steven died from a fentanyl overdose in January 2019. He will be forever loved and missed.

Curt had a tender soul and loved his family, dogs, and music. He lit up the room. He loved street art and dreamed of one day living in Los Angeles. Curt will always be remembered for his jokes and his zest for life. He leaves behind a family who loves and misses him dearly: His wife, his mother and father, two sisters, a niece and nephew, and countless friends. We forever miss his humor, jokes, and hugs.

Billy, Snook, and Lorie
Was loved by many. They left behind children and families that will forever miss them.
They all three lit up the room wherever they were with their smiles, personalities, and laugh.

Two beautiful souls taken far too soon. Words cannot express the emptiness your absence has left in our lives. Our only consolation is that you are finally and truly at peace, in the arms of the angels. ❤️

Ryan was an avid baseball player. He was a Junior College All American and pitched for Rutgers University on a scholarship. He graduated in 2009 with a degree in history. Ryan was a loving son, grandson, cousin, and godfather. He is sorely missed by so many friends and family. Ryan was kindhearted and charming. He had a winning smile and huge dimples. He was a loyal friend. He was your average American boy who grew up in a living two parent household. Like so many, Ryan became addicted to pain pills and eventually turned to heroin. He battled his addiction courageously and tried so hard to get well. The beast of addiction was stronger than him and everyone who tried to help him. His mom Diane was his biggest champion, who fought so hard to save him. She is now an advocate for those suffering from SUD and tells Ryan's story in an effort to stop the stigma of addiction while honoring her beautiful son. Fly high Ryan until we see you again💜💜💜

KC was my only child and the love of my life. He was very smart, extremely athletic, funny, and a very loving, sensitive person. I miss his laugh, his hugs and kisses. I miss hearing him say he loves me. I miss everything about him. He was such a special young man and had so much to offer this world. He was not his disease. He struggled and fought his addiction. He lost his battle because he was poisoned with fentanyl. KC made an impact on many hearts and will live forever in all of us.

My son was a functional addict. He worked 50 hours as a HVAC tech the week he died. It was five days before his 29th birthday. Robert loved the outdoors, rap music, his job, and his family. Robert did not want to die. He wanted to wake up and go to work the next day. I filled out his birthday card to mail out to him and three hours later I got the call. The card would never get mailed.

Michael helped us experience life in ways we never knew existed. He taught us what its like to push the limits. He taught us life is to be lived and felt with every fiber of your body. He taught us you can bounce back from almost anything because, "The truth is, you don't know what is going to happen tomorrow. Life is a crazy ride and nothing is guaranteed."

But most of all, he's taught us that a parent's love is deep. That this love knows no boundries...that we will love him more than the day before times infinity!

In a letter he wrote two years ago he said: "Mom ❤️ Shine on! First off, I want to apologize for the times I've made you cry...I am just glad I have another chance and it's because of you....It kills me to know I've brought so much pain & heartache along with the stress and worry. I'm done making empty promises, Mom. I love you more than life itself. For that, I am by your side for eternity. At your beck & call 'cause you more than deserve it. I remember feeling so lost and stayn' up all night, even til this day, wondering what my purpose is on this earth. And it is like I'm selfish with myself 'cause nobody knows my internal struggle, not even I know, and sometimes I've even prayed trying to figure it out. With unanswered prayers come self-doubt. Without you, I wouldn't be as strong as I am to find myself. So for that I thank you... I love you through thick & thin. I'm thankful for just having you in my life and couldn't imagine living without you. If I ever said anything that's worth remembering, it's in this letter. I've never meant "I love you" more than I do now... Your first son, Michael"

Michael loved deeply... He is now free from the pain and struggles. He is with his Creator. He is home...we will love him forever as he is forever in our hearts. He brought us joy and continues to do so through the many people that knew and loved him. I will forever cherish our last day on the beach. LOVE YOU MICHAEL!

My sister was a woman full of love, caring, gentle Spirit, she was all about peace and love, she enjoyed teaching children and being a caregiver, she was beautiful ❤ she left behind 3 wonderful children Abby, Layne and Elli..💕

My baby sister was a person of love such a beautiful soul she was fun caring crazy! I miss her everyday she left behind 2 children Khaleigha and James 💕